marauderstower | fun times with being a teenage werewolf

[ Lily is, in fact, never impressed when the discussion of werewolves comes up. Not from personal experience of course, but because the idea of painting an entire groups of people (because that's what they are, people) with a wide brush disgusts her. There are terrible people and there are wonderful people, and being a werewolf is not the deciding factor of this. It's bad enough that every single new professor they get decides to go over the same information all over again to invite the same problematic "discourse" to happen, but it's even worse when one encourages it.

Unlike Remus' slow slide downward (which she notices, categorizes, doesn't mention) Lily sits up straighter.

("You're so smart for a Muggle-born Witch, it's amazing! Muggles are usually, you know." rings in her head.)

She raises her hand sharply in a way that cuts off one of the other students mid-sentence, and her smile is like a cold, keen knife. Several of her classmates will recognize it - it's the moment before all hell breaks loose. ]

Professor, I can't help but notice you're allowing rumor and hearsay to rule our conversation today. If I may, I'd like to input my own anecdote about how once, a Wizard stole into my great-aunt's house and tried to murder everyone inside. Honestly, I don't know if I've ever felt comfortable around magical people since. What if they all try to murder me? Wouldn't that be awful? After all, one tried to hurt my family! They're the same scenario, aren't they?

[ A few people are quiet; a few more are quite angry. Their professor is especially so, pressing his lips together into a thin line. ]

"If you are quite done Miss Evans, we'll be continuing the lesson."

[ Lily's smile drops. It's the very last chance. ]

Yes, I apologize. Back to the lesson. Werewolves, correct? Are you telling me that we, as a society, are condemning an entire group of people for something they can't control? That we're meant to treat people different from us as lesser, as evil, as wrong, for something they can't control or change? My, doesn't that sound familiar.

[ And that strikes a chord. A bad one. Now most everyone is some sort of peeved at her - one boy near her asks her, sneering, if she is a werewolf but she just turns her head to stare at him coldly, resolute and unflinching. Then, the professor speaks again: ]

"Detention, Miss Evans."

[It's always a bad day. They always know it's going to be a bad day, and they always double up on sharp enthusiasm and rough distraction and blunt force affection, but it's always a bad day anyway.

It tracks through like most every other terrible version of this bad day has ever been. James is aware of Remus sinking lower and lower, of Sirius edging closer and closer, of his own body shifting farther and farther forward over the desk while Peter more and more firmly kicks him in the leg to keep his mouth shut. He's aware that the small sniping he's been allowing himself to those around him isn't enough. He's aware that the hard work they'll do when this is over to build things back up toward 'normal' (which is still too low, which is still not good enough) will barely be fixed by the time something like this happens again.

In fact, it's one of the days he's least aware of Lily Evans until she actually throws up her hand to speak.

(It's definitely the day he'll remember as the day he was actually, properly in love with anyone for the first time; the day he was actually, properly aware of something still not quite right in the way his own soul sat in his own body.)

He doesn't actually raise his own hand. His hand is needed to shove at Peter lightly to stop kicking because honestly, if Evans spitting all that out in the middle of class wasn't permission to say something much less divisive, what in the world was?] Professor, you can't.

[There are better arguments. There are principled arguments. This can't quite be that, because they're tried letting him go on about these things and it always ends badly.]

You'll literally ruin detention. Look, of course no one likes that Evans has actually done proper research into a complex issue-- and I'm well aware the classroom is no place for debates about real life issues concerning-- [don't say 'our peers,' brain, don't say it] --properly practical topics. But some of us deeply value our time in detention, Professor, away from the Evanses of the world. She'll just keep-- making a series of cogent points at us the whole time. We'll be tricked into engaging with multifaceted subjects and the deep moral quandaries of our day and age.

[That all sounded vague and general, right? Right. Brilliant. Distracting. Smoothing. Unimportant.]

[He'd just been hoping the class period would end as soon as possible and they could just stop talking about this. He doesn't expect what Lily does at all.

But Merlin, he knows now why James is so enraptured with her. They're already friends, have already talked a bit during shared Prefect duties and after that incident in fifth year, but he'd never fully appreciated-- and she's not even saying it in his defense specifically. She's saying it because it's the right thing to do.

He does shoot James a nervous look when he speaks up, then immediately tries to look disinterested as the class' attention turns in his general direction. (Because of course they all four sit together.) But it's fine, James has always been too good at talking his way out of things. It just sounds like he's being his usual self, full of bravado. It's fine.]

[ Lily is furious. She is livid and she has detention and she never has before, not in her entire schooling career, and it's this prick's fault. And now another prick is speaking up and she whips her head aside to glare at Potter, ready with her usual frustration—but something in her expression stills and softens because she's actually listening to the nuances of what he's saying and the meaning behind it. Rather, the fact he agrees with her and he's trying to... get her out of trouble, apparently.

It's something new and unfamiliar and she's not sure what to do about it. Reading between the lines is almost more annoying than he is usually. When their professor speaks again her attention turns back to the front. It's clear he'd caught the biting nature of the little speech anyway. ]

"Well, Mister Potter, you won't have to worry about sharing a detention with Miss Evans." [ There's a pregnant pause, and Lily's eyes widen just slightly— ] "You'll be having yours on another day. Detention for you as well."

[ Lily's book slams flat on the desk as she stands, looking from the group of boys sitting across the room and to their Professor and straightening her spine, imperious and fiery. Then she packs her bag roughly, stepping away and outright glaring. ] If you are quite finished, and as I've already earned my detention, I'll be taking my leave early. This is the sixth year we've had to listen to this rubbish, and frankly I've had all I can stomach. Perhaps next class, you'll actually teach. [ She's storming off before he can even reply, but his voice catches her at the door. ]

"Evans, if you leave this classroom, I will be taking twenty points from Gryffindor."

[ She stills utterly, taking a deep breath. She's never lost points for their house, either. Her hand shakes slightly as it drops to the doorknob, but it's not from fear. She knows things she really shouldn't, and it's not good that Potter's drawn attention back to his group after her display. No. Her jaw sets even though her head dips forward slightly. She'll just draw the attention back to herself. Better this way. ]

So be it.

[ Then she's gone, door slamming shut behind her. She feels a bit like she's going to vomit. ]

[Detention is easy. Detention is the sort of thing that happens. At least, it's the sort of thing that happens to James Potter. It's not the sort of thing that happens to Lily Evans. Losing points is even less the sort of thing that happens to Lily Evans.

If he'd missed the brief stillness in her expression, it's just as well she likely misses the brief flash of egoless devotion as she turns to leave. It seeps into his voice, soft and genuinely impressed, as he leans a little sideways on his elbow toward Remus.]

--'s the future Ms. Potter. Telling you.

[And then he's off again, leaning forward over the desk dramatically to swat at the boys in front of them with his usual bright whispering.]

D'you see that? [Obviously. Whatever.] Evans went off. [It's not going to earn him any points in the young woman's book. That's all right. That can get dealt with some other time.] You think she'll run that up the chain? I'll take odds on a new professor by the end of the week. End of the day, even.

[This, after all, isn't such a bad campaign to be launching. 'Did you hear a perfectly good and well respected student lost it at poor teaching?' 'Did you hear the DADA professor might get sacked?' Much better conversation pieces than the usual continued ripples after a class like this, with the occasional re-ripple of conversation hours after the class ended as students remembered yet another bit of trivia they might once have heard about werewolves.

Thank goodness this isn't a class that needs focus. There are minds to bend into speculation about the tenure of Hogwarts professors; who has time for all the rest? Much better to start speculating wildly about what other professors might get fired. And honestly, who can even remember what set Evans off in the first place?

It'll take a bit, but it's a winnable conversation shift. Waste of a popular face not to make it happen.]

Edited (whoops) 2016-11-08 20:37 (UTC)

[He's not good at words. He's not good at laying it all out for someone to understand things from a new perspective. He lets James and even Lily take on that, whenever it's necessary to do for Remus' sake. Does his best to sit next to his friend and sneakily rest his hand against his during class, instead. If he can't defend him with words, he can at least remind him he's not alone.

He can also, and does, keep a mental note of some of the particularly opinionated people in the class. Usually manages to find, somehow and coincidentally, a reason to get into a fight with said people. They're always quick things, usually have the other person scuttling away with embarrassment for losing so thoroughly or because they don't want to get into any additional trouble. Sirius has learned well from his parents how to make a hurt show up quickly and without being visible. Sirius has learned to take a great amount of pain so that his scuffles don't land him in the hospital wing. He usually fixes himself up or gets James to lend a hand, so Remus can keep having plausible deniability about Sirius' involvement in anything that'll wind up with him bruised. Most people, even if they end up in the hospital wing, tend not to want to name him because he always makes sure to let them know it'll just be worse next time if they do.

(He tries not to think of himself as his father or mother, when he says it. Tries to tell himself it's like with Regulus. He's protecting Remus. It doesn't make the blood-- metaphorical or the one that literally ends up on his knuckles-- feel like it's gone any faster.)

But he's still got a sharp, victorious smile as he slides in across from Remus at dinner. He's managed to clean the blood off his split lip, but he's going to need James' help later for the bruises across his chest. It has him wincing slightly as he settles in.

Still, his voice is chipper as he helps himself to food.]

D'you hear Reynolds got himself landed in the hospital wing? From an actual Muggle fistfight, even. I didn't know he'd deign t'stoop so low.

[He doesn't expect them to speak out on his behalf. He's not even sure he really wants them to, he doesn't want to bring any attention regarding werewolves their way. But it's nice to know they would. Sometimes Sirius' hand against his is the only thing that gets him through.

Despite his friends best efforts to distract him, Remus is usually pretty glum the days they go over werewolves in class. And it happens every year because they can never keep a DADA instructor long enough for a steady curriculum to be developed. Normally he might at least try to look disapproving at Sirius getting into fights behind his back, but now he just feels guilty because he knows it was done on his behalf.

Plus there was the added guilt of being complicit through his "If I didn't see it, it didn't happen" attitude. Honestly, he was the last person to deserve his Prefect badge; if Dumbledore chose him in hopes he'd put a stop to his friends' more unreasonable pranks and fights, well... Remus supposed he was just a disappointment to the man.

Sirius is not subtle at all, even without the split lip. But as always, Remus chooses not to acknowledge it.]

Always the gossip hound, aren't you, Sirius? [There's a joke there. See? He must be feeling better.] I hadn't heard that, no.

[The quiet pun earns a bark of a laugh, which promptly earns the faintest of winces as it disrupts the bruises on his chest. He manages to call up a smile to his lips almost instantly after. No need to make Remus worry more-- knowing him, he was probably already feeling guilty, even though he shouldn't.

This was entirely on Sirius, and he only had himself to blame for how awful he could feel himself twisting into, sometimes, when fighting the people who'd said such rude things. But they'd started it-- hadn't they?]

You know me. The source of all information y'need about the going-ons here in our fine institution. 's why you keep me around, 'sn't it?

I keep you around for lots of reasons.

[Remus draws up a teasing smirk, flicking a pea at Sirius. Under the table, he nudges his leg against Sirius' pointedly. He wouldn't have made it through class without all of their support, in all the quiet and not so quiet ways it was given. He has to show appreciation for that.]

's that so?

[A bright, fond grin back at his friend. He tries and fails to catch the pea and eat it; settles instead for nudging his knee back against Remus'.]

Glad to hear 'm such an incredible catch, then.

[He huffs out a laugh, slightly tempted to toss more at him, but it wouldn't be very Prefect-ly to start a food fight.]

That's what all the girls say, y'know. That you're an incredible catch.

[A laugh as one brow lifts in response to Remus' words.]

Gossiping with the girls about me, are you?

[It was clear Lily knew something, not because she'd spoken up during class but because before she went off to her detention, she caught him alone and took his hand, kissing him on the cheek, and there was a look in her eyes-- she knew.

He just wasn't entirely sure how much she knew. Maybe she thought he was just related to a werewolf. He did often use the excuse that his mother was ill when asked about his frequent absences.

It was his night to patrol anyway, so he waited in the hall outside Gryffindor tower for her to return from her detention.]

[ Lily gets back from her detention late not because she lingers overlong in the corridors but because their vindictive professor keeps her back late. He'd given her lines, of all things, and made her restart over and over even though her impeccable handwriting never wavers.

I will not disrespect my professor or classmates.

She'd laughed unkindly when he told her what to write, and she's sure that's part of why he's kept her as long as he has. She's shaking her hand slightly to work out the cramps in her fingers and wrist when she's approaching the tower, and her eyebrows go up when she spots Remus. ]

Remus. I'd forgotten the schedule. All right, yeah?

[ She stalls by him, searching his face. ]

[He drops his gaze for a second when she looks at him, instinctive, then returns her look again. He's trying to look and sound casual. It might be working.]

He kept you late, huh? You're not exactly a regular in detention. [No, that would be his friends.]

I laughed at the punishment. Made him a bit more angry with me, I must admit.

[ She smiles at him, looking up into his face. She knows the way he tenses when he's trying to be casual. She doesn't want to make him nervous. ]

Had to restart a few times, it let him get his anger out I suppose. [ A beat. ] Going out or coming back? I hope I didn't miss our entire rounds.

Professors usually don't like it when you laugh at their punishments, no.

[He's going to be nervous no matter what. This is a nerve-wracking situation for him.]

Right prick, isn't he? At least he'll be gone next year. [Technically he should be halfway through with them by now. But this is the best option for talking to her without anyone else overhearing.] Going out.

Well, perhaps he shouldn't give ridiculous detentions for ridiculous reasons. Then I wouldn't laugh at his punishment.

[ On a hum. She looks like she feels a bit less panicky about her track record, at least. But then she nods. ]

Small favors, yeah? But then we'll just have a new prick to deal with. I'm glad I caught you in time, at least. Shall we?

[ They shall, apparently. Things are quite usual save the obvious as they go, though at length and after some thought she takes the time to hook her arm through his, just in case. ] I wanted to apologize for making such a scene earlier. [ Testingly. ]

But he's the teacher, so he's infallible, and any form of disagreement with him is undermining his authority.

[Remus rolls his eyes. It was so annoying having teachers like that. Maybe if it weren't for the jinx on the position, they'd be able to get someone who knew how to teach instead of, presumably, scrambling for whoever was willing to be next on the chopping block each year. In that situation, no wonder they always attracted idiots taking power trips on teens.

He tenses a bit when she loops her arm through his. Somehow he doubts it's just a gesture of affection.]

It was impressive, honestly. You don't need to apologize, though. [A beat. Perhaps a bit hypocritically,] I'm sorry you got detention. And points taken. I don't remember that ever happening with you before. [Granted, he hadn't always been paying attention... James would probably know for sure, though.]

I had no idea we were signing up for a dictatorship rather than an actual learning experience. Imagine.

[ It is a gesture of affection, but it's also something else too. She feels him tense but doesn't comment on it, instead using her grasp as a means to be turned toward him slightly as she speaks, shaking her head. ]

Mostly I'm angry no one else does it. [ Then she cocks an eyebrow slightly. ] I haven't. Either one. [ Which probably explains why she'd seemed to have an undercurrent of upset beneath her anger just after everyone else got out of class. She sighs, squeezing his arm. ] It's all right, though. I know I'm not the one in the wrong.

[ There's a beat's pause before she ventures cautiously: ] We've become good friends, haven't we?

Seems like in those discussions it's always the people who know the least that say the most. [Remus shrugs, trying to ignore the irrational stab of guilt.

He can sense the way the conversation is going; it's wholly expected, but it still makes him intensely nervous.] I like to think so. I know you don't always agree with my other choices in friends, but... [Merlin, this sounds an awful lot like someone's about to ask someone else on a date. Probably looks it too. Good thing no one else is around, the rumors would be intolerable.]

People that feel safe like to run their mouths, after all.

[ AKA people that don't have to worry about that kind of thing.

She almost laughs at what Remus says, but it's really not the right time. ] I quite liked James today, honestly. [ There's a beat's pause as she realizes she's called him by his first name—there's a reluctant flush to her cheeks and she glances away, pressing on. ] Anyway. I'm really glad we're friends. [ It really does sound like that, she's realizing, and she's actually a little flustered this time, really very glad there's no one else around. ] And you know I'll be your friend no matter what, right?

fun times with being a teenage werewolf

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/shrugemoji

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later that night; quiet talks

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